Two Things Every Parent Needs to Know About Raising a Child

As you probably know, raising children is the most adventurous and most challenging thing we can give ourselves to. And as you might also know, training your kids to have good habits and skills doesn’t happen by chance. It happens when you know what you’re doing, have a vision, and are intentional.

But what makes this challenging is that we often have a lot working against us. To begin, many of us millennials enter motherhood with little to no training whatsoever. We often don’t know how to relate to our kids, what to train them in, how to do it, etc. As a result, we end up feeling frustrated, discouraged, and even guilty. If you’ve ever felt this way, take courage! There is a way out!

Another thing that makes child raising challenging is that we are raising our kids in a time where evil and immoral influences are ridiculously easily accessible. Once upon a time in our society, certain things (like immodesty on television and blatantly disrespecting authority) were not considered the norm. Now, unfortunately, they are. Our kids can easily access things we don’t want them seeing or listening to.

I feel like one of the biggest things we need is understanding. We need to know what we’re dealing with, have some clear action steps, and then implement with consistency. And I believe that all of these, with a life grounded in prayer, can actually put us on the path to loving and embracing what we do as moms. We can actually wake up and look forward to our days with joy and clarity and start seeing the fruit we’re looking for!

So let’s look at two foundational things I believe every millennial mom needs to know about raising a child. I pray that this helps give some deep guidance to what you do from day to day!

#1: Children do what we do

The first thing that we as millennial moms have to understand is that our kids will do what we do. Have you every heard the phrase “more is caught than taught”? The idea is that our children will “catch” more of our habits than we teach them. They, in a sense, will absorb who we are.

The awesome thing about this is that our kids can absorb our strengths. My parents, for instance, never once taught me to have a good work ethic, but they lived it. They did what they had to do to make ends meet and get things done. So guess what? I ended up coming out from under them with a very strong work ethic (thanks Mom and Dad!).

On the other hand, the down side of this is that our kids also absorb our character flaws. I don’t know how many times I’ve listened to my oldest daughter use a certain tone with her sister and think, she sounds just like me. And it certainly is humbling when your kids are mirroring your own character back to you!

As much as we would sometimes want them to do what we say and not what we do, it’s really not the way things work. We can’t require them to do right if it’s not a practice in our lives. I truly believe that if we do this, it plants seeds of anger in their little hearts toward our hypocrisy.

So what can we do? Take heed to our actions (words, tones, things we do). Be who we want to train your kids to be. Become disciplined mamas and exercise self-control. And work diligently, thoroughly, and faithfully at our daily duties!

#2: Children need continuous attention and guidance

If I could narrow this list down to only one piece of advice, this would be it. Our children need continuous attention and guidance.

Why is it important to know and understand this? Because we can very easily make the mistake of thinking that telling our kids something one time is enough.

Training a child is constant and often inconvenient. To really train them well, we must invest continual attention and give clear guidance. We have to show them exactly how to do what we want them to do, and we need to be present and attentive to make sure they do it every time (as much as we possibly can).

I did not understand this my first few years of parenting. I thought that I should be able to tell my child once to do something and that she should listen. So when this didn’t happen, I would get upset and frustrated.

What I failed to realize is that I as an adult, I don’t even do things the first time every time. And I can’t expect my child to be more mature than me, so I need to supply continuous attention and guidance. Kids need to be directed and redirected to the right path constantly.

To grow consistently as a mom, purpose in your heart that you are going to learn all you can. You want to train your kids as best as you can while they are still under your roof. We can’t learn everything at once, but a little bit everyday will go a long way in our efforts to raise our children well!

If you don’t know where to start, check out my resource page by clicking below. There, I have a running list of resources that have helped me grow as a mom!