If you’ve been in the SAHM (stay at home mom) business for a while, then you know that there are times when all the advice you’ve received from people or books just doesn’t seem to work. You try to implement an idea, a routine, or system, but you find that it doesn’t seem to be doing for you what it did for the person who gave you the advice.
And sometimes you just have those hard mom days where you’re not quite sure how to handle yourself, much less your child!
It’s these times that we moms need a solution that works. We need personalized counsel for our specific situations. And it’s especially in these times that I’m grateful to God for giving us the Holy Spirit!
The Bible calls the Holy Spirit our Counselor and the one who leads us into all truth. He is also our Helper because He helps us walk in upright paths. I believe God knew we would need personalized counsel to face the things we face everyday!
Maybe you have a child who’s especially challenging. Maybe you have a child with a chronic illness. Or maybe you just run into sticky discipline scenarios where you don’t know what to do. Whatever your situation is, the Holy Spirit knows you, your children, and what’s needed for the moment.
How can the Holy Spirit help you as a mom? Here are three Biblical ways I’ve personally encountered His help in day to day life, and I know He can and will do the same for you.
The Holy Spirit helps you get your emotions under control
I don’t know about you, but I’ve had my fair share of Angry Mom Syndrome. You know, those times where your child does something that makes you so mad you can’t even think straight. Or when your kids are being so constant you can’t get a moment’s rest and you just explode. Yes, I’ve had more of these moments than I care to admit!
Thankfully, God understands and He doesn’t leave us to try to figure out how to handle these things on our own. If we run to Him, He’ll help us regulate our thoughts and emotions so that we don’t end up doing or saying things that can cause damage.
I’ve learned that when I’m really struggling with my emotions toward my child/children, I can go to the Lord in that moment and tell Him exactly how I feel. There are a few times, I admit, that I’ve said, “Lord, if you don’t help me with this child I could hurt her and I don’t want to!” I’m thankful that I don’t have to allow myself to vent anger and frustration onto my children. When I encounter my own impatience, I can go to Him and receive the supernatural help that I need.
If I yield to the Lord in these moments, I can really see the kingdom of Christ at work in my heart. We all want to have our emotions under control, so we need to turn the Holy Spirit for help!
The Holy Spirit can give you specific strategies
I’ll never forget the time when I struggled so much as a stay at home mom that I wanted to throw in the towel. In the midst of trying to take care of my kids I had come across so many personal shortcomings and I felt very frustrated and defeated. I felt like I kept falling into the same mental and emotional traps of irritability, impatience, and being quick to anger when dealing with my kids, and it seemed like I could never quite overcome.
One day, in the midst of really struggling with one of my children in particular, I got on my knees and prayed that God would just tell me what I needed to do. My personality was clashing with my child’s, and I was finding myself constantly irritated and always looking forward to her next naptime/bedtime. If you’ve ever been there, or are there now, then you know it’s not how you want to live.
After I prayed, I heard this word in my heart: Consistency. It was then that I realized more clearly that my parenting strategies had been all over the place, and I was implementing different things but not sticking to them. Thank God that He sees outside of our situation and can give us the counsel we need!
I’ve also experienced the Holy Spirit’s specific strategies when coaching my athletes. At one point, I had an athlete who was very difficult to deal with. She had an awful attitude and was causing a lot of drama on the team. At one tournament, her attitude was so terrible that I’d had it. I was so angry that I felt hot inside, and I was ready to give her an unhealthy piece of my mind.
On the way home, I prayed and asked the Lord how to handle her. In my heart I heard this phrase: Speak life. He wanted me to have a conversation with her that would lift her up from where she was to where she needed to be. I knew that’s what the Lord wanted me to do, but what I really wanted to do was just punish her!
So the next day I had a long talk with her and although I was still pretty angry with her actions, the Holy Spirit gave me the grace to say the right words. Long story short, not only did she change her attitude starting from that day on, she went on to such a transformation that she also improved her skill level, changed the way she related to her teammates, and is on her way to playing college volleyball!
The Holy Spirit knows the right strategies for every situation. He gives wisdom freely-ask and you will receive!
The Holy Spirit helps you pray properly for your kids
“In the same way the Spirit also helps our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words…” (Romans 8:26).
We don’t see the full picture of anything, really, unless the Lord opens up our eyes to what’s going on in the realm of the spirit. That’s why we need the help of the Holy Spirit when praying for our kids.
Very often when I sit down to pray for my kids, I will get redirected to pray for my own self. I’m their example and they learn their conduct lessons from my own conduct, so it’s important that I’m allowing Christ to rule my heart. They need to see more of Him, not more frustration/impatience/unkindness!
The Holy Spirit also knows what’s going on in our kids’ hearts. When we pray according to His leading, He helps us to pray the things that need to be prayed over their hearts and minds. He tailors our prayers to the need of the moment and the season so that they can be timely and even more effective.
I hope this encourages you, Mom, to trust the Holy Spirit as your Helper. He cares about our kids more than we ever could, and He will help us if we ask Him!